June 25, 2004

Office of the POPE
Vatican City, Rome, Italy

A Special message from the Pope to Men and Woman of America.

My dear brothers and sisters in Christ, we here in service to our
Lord, Jesus Christ, and his only TRUE CHURCH- the Roman Catholic
Church, wish to extent to all of you an exciting opportunity to join
our multi-Billion dollar a year worldwide organization as a priest or
nun.

As many of you know, the Roman Catholic Church is the largest gay,
lesbian, and pedophilic organization in the world today. Current, we
have thousands of fine gay men and woman, many with deep pedophilic
impulses who have discovered that the Roman Catholic Church is the
place to be for many who are unwanted and unappreciated by the general
American public.

You may have heard that the Roman Catholic Church is currently in
desperate need of Priests and Nuns, as out current flock is way to thin
to meet the needs of our catholic brothers and sisters. As a Priest
or Nun the Catholic church has much to offer: Completely free
housing, meals, health care; especially important for the growing
number of priests with aids great retirement program, and an unlimited
supply of young boys and girls for your sexual delight.

Let's face facts, in the real world, many of you are constantly under
attack for your sexual needs and desires by a public that just doesn't
understand you. However, My Church knows exactly what you need and we
give it to you. And, best of all, should you get caught with your
you-now-what in some boy's or Girl's you-know-what, the Church will
spare no expense to fight on your behalf. Why, just this century
alone the church has spend Hundreds of Millions of Dollars taking care
of its brothers and sisters who got caught in flagrante delicto with
young boys and girls whom they were ministering to. No other
profession will defend child rapist and molesters like the Roman
Catholic Church does on behalf of its earthly servants of Jesus
Christ. If you were a school teacher, or police officer, or doctor and
got caught having sex with a nine year old boy or girl, you would be
sent to jail for a long, long time. But, as a servant of the Roman
Catholic Church, you will be defended, given counsel, moved to a safe
place-- in general, we will spare no expense or effort to keep you
free and out of harms way.

And, if I may be blunt, which would you rather be: A 65 year old Man
with a wrinkled, ugly, woman like a Linda Tripp or Lucianne Goldberg as
a wife, or a single unmarried 65 year old Priest with and endless
supply of eight to thirteen year old boys and girls, with firm, hot,
flesh, and pliable young minds easily manipulated to serve you, an
agent of CHRIST.

Now, I know that some of you may be thinking that the Church is too
big and that perhaps you could do just a well is one of the other
smaller Christian cults, like the Mormon, Baptist, or Protestant
Churches. Well, to be honest, they also offer many similar
opportunities, but why settle for second or third best when you can go
first class. And, in the Catholic Church, you have the chance to
become a POPE, just like me. IF you study the history of our great
church you will learn that the POPES knew how to party also.. HA HA
HA, we really do have a jolly good time-- if you get my drift.

So don't wait another second, go and visit your local Roman Catholic
Church and tell the Priest in charge that you want to join. There is
no sign-up fee, no test, no background checks, and we firmly believe
in Don't Ask and Don't tell, if you know what I mean.

And remember, Jesus loves the Children most of all. We here in the
True Church of Christ try to live up to that fact each and every day.

Thank you and may Jesus and his Dad, GOD, bless each and everyone of
you.

The POPE

OK Overdose, how many posts like this before we decide that Xona's an idiot?

I decided lastnight... Xona is an idiot, I second the nomination for Xona as moron of the year.

I third the nomination...and the bannination has ensued.