HaVoK
05-19-2004, 07:10 PM
A guy walks into a bar, notices a very large jar on the counter, and sees
it's filled to the brim with $10 bills.
He guesses there must be thousands of dollars in it.
He approaches the bartender and asks, "What's up with the jar?"
"Well, you pay $10, and if you pass three tests, you get all the money."
The man certainly isn't going to pass this up. "What are the three
tests?"
"Pay first, those are the rules." says the bartender. So the man gives
him the $10,
and the bartender drops it into the jar.
"OK," the bartender says, "here's what you need to do....First you have
to drink that entire gallon of pepper tequila...the whole thing, all at
once...and you can't make a face while doing it.
"Second, there's a pit bull chained-up out back with a sore tooth. You
have to remove the tooth with your bare hands.
"Third, there's a 90-year-old woman upstairs who has never reached orgasm
during intercourse. You have to go up there and make things right for her."
The man is stunned. "I know I paid my 10 bucks, but I'm not an idiot! I
won't do it!
You have to be nuts to drink a gallon of pepper tequila, and then do
those other things...."
"Your call," says the bartender, "but your money stays where it is."
As time goes on and the man has a few drinks, then a few more, he asks,
"Wherez zat teeqeelah?"
He grabs the gallon with both hands and downs it with a big slurp. Tears
are streaming down both cheeks, but he doesn't make a face.
Next, he staggers out back where the pit bull is chained-up,
and soon all the people inside the bar hear a huge, noisy, scuffle going
on outside.
They hear the pit bull barking, the guy screaming, the pit bull yelping,
and then... silence.
Just when they think the man surely must be dead, he staggers back into
the bar,
with his shirt ripped and large bloody scratches all over his body.
"Now," he says, "where's the old woman with the sore tooth?"
it's filled to the brim with $10 bills.
He guesses there must be thousands of dollars in it.
He approaches the bartender and asks, "What's up with the jar?"
"Well, you pay $10, and if you pass three tests, you get all the money."
The man certainly isn't going to pass this up. "What are the three
tests?"
"Pay first, those are the rules." says the bartender. So the man gives
him the $10,
and the bartender drops it into the jar.
"OK," the bartender says, "here's what you need to do....First you have
to drink that entire gallon of pepper tequila...the whole thing, all at
once...and you can't make a face while doing it.
"Second, there's a pit bull chained-up out back with a sore tooth. You
have to remove the tooth with your bare hands.
"Third, there's a 90-year-old woman upstairs who has never reached orgasm
during intercourse. You have to go up there and make things right for her."
The man is stunned. "I know I paid my 10 bucks, but I'm not an idiot! I
won't do it!
You have to be nuts to drink a gallon of pepper tequila, and then do
those other things...."
"Your call," says the bartender, "but your money stays where it is."
As time goes on and the man has a few drinks, then a few more, he asks,
"Wherez zat teeqeelah?"
He grabs the gallon with both hands and downs it with a big slurp. Tears
are streaming down both cheeks, but he doesn't make a face.
Next, he staggers out back where the pit bull is chained-up,
and soon all the people inside the bar hear a huge, noisy, scuffle going
on outside.
They hear the pit bull barking, the guy screaming, the pit bull yelping,
and then... silence.
Just when they think the man surely must be dead, he staggers back into
the bar,
with his shirt ripped and large bloody scratches all over his body.
"Now," he says, "where's the old woman with the sore tooth?"