It's slow . I'm bored. Somone say something scandalousss:@@:

something scandalousss:@@:

ooo say it again..............

Maybe i'll put some more emphasis into it...

something....SCANNNNNNNDALOUSSSSSSSSS:@@:

:)

nice.......now say something daring...........

Originally posted by creetwins
nice.......now say something daring...........

The world would be a much better place if all the religious extremists were exiled to an island and armed with clubs and permitted to exterminate one another...
:hitout:

yeah let them choke on their own hatred............

now..........somebody dance.........................:hula:

I call this one.............the banana!
:banana:

Interesting thread. :corn:

[clop clop clop]
[whinny whinny]
GALAHAD:
They're nervous, sire.
ARTHUR:
Then we'd best leave them here and carry on on foot. Dis-mount!
TIM:
Behold the cave of Caerbannog!
ARTHUR:
Right! Keep me covered.
GALAHAD:
What with?
ARTHUR:
W-- just keep me covered.
TIM:
Too late!
[dramatic chord]
ARTHUR:
What?
TIM:
There he is!
ARTHUR:
Where?
TIM:
There!
ARTHUR:
What, behind the rabbit?
TIM:
It is the rabbit.
ARTHUR:
You silly sod!
TIM:
What?
ARTHUR:
You got us all worked up!
TIM:
Well, that's no ordinary rabbit!
ARTHUR:
Ohh.
TIM:
That's the most foul, cruel, and bad-tempered rodent you ever set eyes on!
ROBIN:
You tit! I soiled my armour I was so scared!
TIM:
Look, that rabbit's got a vicious streak a mile wide! It's a killer!
GALAHAD:
Get stuffed!
TIM:
He'll do you up a treat, mate.
GALAHAD:
Oh, yeah?
ROBIN:
You mangy Scots git!
TIM:
I'm warning you!
ROBIN:
What's he do, nibble your bum?
TIM:
He's got huge, sharp-- eh-- he can leap about-- look at the bones!
ARTHUR:
Go on, Bors. Chop his head off!
BORS:
Right! Silly little bleeder. One rabbit stew comin' right up!
TIM:
Look!
[squeak]
BORS:
Aaaugh!
[dramatic chord]
[clunk]
ARTHUR:
Jesus Christ!
TIM:
I warned you!
ROBIN:
I done it again!
TIM:
I warned you, but did you listen to me? Oh, no, you knew it all, didn't you? Oh, it's just a harmless little bunny, isn't it? Well, it's always the same. I always tell them--
ARTHUR:
Oh, shut up!
TIM:
Do they listen to me?
ARTHUR:
Right!
TIM:
Oh, no...
KNIGHTS:
Charge!
[squeak squeak squeak]
KNIGHTS:
Aaaaugh!, Aaaugh!, etc.
ARTHUR:
Run away! Run away!
KNIGHTS:
Run away! Run away!...
TIM:
Ha ha ha ha! Ha haw haw! Ha! Ha ha!
ARTHUR:
Right. How many did we lose?
LAUNCELOT:
Gawain.
GALAHAD:
Ector.
ARTHUR:
And Bors. That's five.
GALAHAD:
Three, sir.
ARTHUR:
Three. Three. And we'd better not risk another frontal assault. That rabbit's dynamite.
ROBIN:
Would it help to confuse it if we run away more?
ARTHUR:
Oh, shut up and go and change your armour.
GALAHAD:
Let us taunt it! It may become so cross that it will make a mistake.
ARTHUR:
Like what?
GALAHAD:
Well... ooh.
LAUNCELOT:
Have we got bows?
ARTHUR:
No.
LAUNCELOT:
We have the Holy Hand Grenade.
ARTHUR:
Yes, of course! The Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch! 'Tis one of the sacred relics Brother Maynard carries with him. Brother Maynard! Bring up the Holy Hand Grenade!
MONKS: [chanting]
Pie Iesu domine, dona eis requiem.
Pie Iesu domine, dona eis requiem. Pie Iesu domine, dona eis requiem. Pie Iesu domine, dona eis requiem.
ARTHUR:
How does it, um-- how does it work?
LAUNCELOT:
I know not, my liege.
ARTHUR:
Consult the Book of Armaments!
BROTHER MAYNARD:
Armaments, chapter two, verses nine to twenty-one.
SECOND BROTHER:
And Saint Attila raised the hand grenade up on high, saying, 'O Lord, bless this Thy hand grenade that, with it, Thou mayest blow Thine enemies to tiny bits in Thy mercy.'
And the Lord did grin, and the people did feast upon the lambs and sloths and carp and anchovies and orangutans and breakfast cereals and fruit bats and large chu--
MAYNARD:
Skip a bit, Brother.
SECOND BROTHER:
And the Lord spake, saying, 'First shalt thou take out the Holy Pin. Then, shalt thou count to three. No more. No less. Three shalt be the number thou shalt count, and the number of the counting shall be three. Four shalt thou not count, nor either count thou two, excepting that thou then proceed to three. Five is right out. Once the number three, being the third number, be reached, then, lobbest thou thy Holy Hand Grenade of Antioch towards thy foe, who, being naughty in My sight, shall snuff it.'
MAYNARD:
Amen.
KNIGHTS:
Amen.
ARTHUR:
Right!
One!... Two!... Five!
GALAHAD:
Three, sir!
ARTHUR:
Three!
[angels sing]
[boom]

Monty Python?

What else?

On second thought, let's not go to Camelot. It is a silly place.

Go boil your bottoms sons of a silly person!
Your mother was a hamster and your father smelled of elderberries.
I blow my nose at you so called Arthur king, you and all of your english knnniggetts.

Now go away or I will taunt you a second time!

I fart in your general direction!

Ah, yes, I found a site that has the scripts for the Monty Python movies.
http://www.mwscomp.com/python.html

Bravely bold Sir Robin rode forth from Camelot.
He was not afraid to die, O brave Sir Robin.
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways,
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin!

He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp,
Or to have his eyes gouged out and his elbows broken,
To have his kneecaps split and his body burned away
And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin!

His head smashed in and his heart cut out
And his liver removed and his bowels unplugged
And his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off
And his pen--

kay that was fun..........what's next freaks?:corn:

Originally posted by creetwins
kay that was fun..........what's next freaks?:corn:

How about some gratuitous violence?

:hitout: :hitout: :hitout: :hitout: :hitout:

" ... beat me!!! whip me!!! make me write bad checks!!!..."

LET'S GO DRESS UP LIKE GHOSTS AND BURN CITY HALL!!!

viva la revolución!!

after seeing vile's smilies beating up other smilies, it just seemed like the right thing to do

"Now give them 2 of these...and two of these....and these and these and these"........

"Thank you doctor".

-"oh I am not a doctor!"

:@@:

Originally posted by box19
viva la revolución!! Lets all wear berets and call each other comrades!! ... ... Awww there's no smiley beret...

that is a great idea, comrade mapper! and we can sing "le internationale": arise, ye prisoners of starvation, arise ye wretched of the earth.....

now justice thunders condemnation, a better world's in birth...

(so which is better sputnik, Le Internationale, or Weezer?)

no more traditions chains shall bind us, arise ye slaves no more in thrall...

that is a very good question indeed

the earth shall rise on new foundations, we have been nought, we shall be all


(we don't call each other comrade when we sing weezer, but somehow the tunes are just slightly prettier. and no memories of deranged parents singing it to me in a car driving through the foothills of jerusalem. but le internationale has so much family heritage...)

Originally posted by WhammyBar
now justice thunders condemnation, a better world's in birth...

(so which is better sputnik, Le Internationale, or Weezer?)

What's with these homies, dissin' my girl? - Weezer

Originally posted by LionelHutz
What's with these homies, dissin' my girl? - Weezer


oohh, look, even stuffy lawyers like Weezer....

I'm a decidedly unstuffy lawyer. :)

that's good. I kow both stuffy an unstuffy lawayers, and the unstuffy ones are a hell of a lot more fun.

kay freaks and geeks...see if you can help me remember something...

All the political weirdness you Americans put yourselves through got me to thinking about the Simpson's episode where the green aliens came and took over the bodies of the presidential candidates, you know the one where they are walking down the street holding hands?. Then the abortion discussions reminded me of when the "presidential candidate" says to the people "abortions for everyone" everyone boos, then he says "abortions for none" more boos. For the life of me I cannot remember the names of the aliens. I keep wanting to think they are called chang and lang but aren't they the famous siamese twins???

Kang and Kodos. They're in every Treehouse of Horrors episode.

i had a feeling it might be you borg!!

Thanks, that episode is so funny

Kang: (as Sen. Dole) - Abortions for all...
Crowd: (Boos)
Kang: Very well, no abortions for anyone...
Crowd: (more boos)
Kang: hmmm.....abortions for some, miniature american flags for all!
Crowd: (Cheers)

yesss!
thank you that is so funny.

the end is hilarious too, when they have taken over the earth and now everyone is slaves and homer gets whippped and marge goes "don't look at me I voted for kodos"

Something like that I don't remember verbatim

One that I'll always remember.

Homer is sick from eating a week old giant sandwich because the mayo turned. the kids want to go to duff gaRDENS. One of the aunts took them wanting to see if she could parent. They are in the tunnel and the song "duff beer for me duff beer for you" Bart tries to get Lisa to drink the water and they are fighting. Finally aunt Selma goes "lisa drink the water" Afterwards lisa starts freaking out and looks at her aunt and she morphs into one of the illustrations from Hunter s Thompson's Fear and Loathing, so Lisa takes off on a trip. They find her swimming naked in the fountain going "I am the lizard queen" and dancing. Finally they tell her to take all these pills and someone asks her if she's ok and she goes "can't talk, coming down."

One of the best ever

Marge: Homer, I found this (the sub) behind the radiator...I really think you should get rid of it.
Homer: Suggestion noted................(eats the sandwhich)

Another great episode......just like all the other 300+

"watch me unravel and i'll soon be naked lyin on the floor
lyin on the floor, i've come undone"

"Set coordinates for Bob Dole!"

Bart: "Dad, are you licking toads again?"
Homer: "I'm not not licking toads, son." [licks a toad, gets dialated pupils and dances off]

Chief Wiggum: Ok folks. Shows over. Nothing to see here. Show's OH MY GOD A HORRIBLE PLANE CRASH!! Hey everybody, get a load of this flaming wreckage!! C'mon, crowd around! Crowd around, don't be shy, crowd around!

Chief Wiggum: "Thank GOD the bomb landed in that big smoking crater!"

Chief Wiggum: Put out an APB for a suspect driving a.........car, of some sort, headed in the direction of.......you know, that place that sells chili. Suspect is hatless, repeat, hatless!

Wiggum: "This is Wiggum reporting a 318: waking a police officer."

Bart: Take him away boys.
Wiggum: Hey, i'm the police chief here....bake him away toys.
Officer: what's that chief??
Wiggum.....do what the kid says.

A drug dog finds some marijuana in a blind man's pocket. Eddie remarks that it could be medicinal.

Blind Guy: "Right, right, medicinal! Without it, I could, uh... go even blinder! ... Right?"