HaVoK
02-13-2004, 02:29 PM
One day in the company
cafeteria, Jack and Mike are on break. >Mike turns to
his pal and says, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I
better go see a doctor." Mike replies. "There's a
diagnostic computer down at Walmart. Just give it a
urine sample and the computer will tell you what's
wrong and what to do about it. It takes about 10
seconds and cost 10 dollars... a lot cheaper than a
doctor." > >So Jack deposits a urine sample in a small
jar and takes it to Walmart. He deposits the 10
dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the
urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and
waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a
printout: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in
warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will
improve!
in about 2 weeks. Thank you for shopping at Walmart"
That evening while thinking about how amazing this
new technology was, Jack started to wonder if the
computer could be fooled and make it give a wrong
answer. To this end, he mixed some tap water, a stool
sample from his dog, a urine sample from his wife and
daughter and then he masturbated into the mixture for
good measure. Jack hurries back to Walmart, eager to
check the results. He deposits 10 dollars, pours in
his concoction, and awaits the results. The computer
prints the following:
1) Your tap water is to hard, get a water softener.
2) Your dog has ringworms. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3) Your daughter has a cocaine habit, get her into rehab.
4) Your wife is pregnant, TWINS, They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5) If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get any better.
Thank you for shopping at Walmart!
cafeteria, Jack and Mike are on break. >Mike turns to
his pal and says, "My elbow hurts like hell. I guess I
better go see a doctor." Mike replies. "There's a
diagnostic computer down at Walmart. Just give it a
urine sample and the computer will tell you what's
wrong and what to do about it. It takes about 10
seconds and cost 10 dollars... a lot cheaper than a
doctor." > >So Jack deposits a urine sample in a small
jar and takes it to Walmart. He deposits the 10
dollars and the computer lights up and asks for the
urine sample. He pours the sample into the slot and
waits. Ten seconds later, the computer ejects a
printout: "You have tennis elbow. Soak your arm in
warm water and avoid heavy activity. It will
improve!
in about 2 weeks. Thank you for shopping at Walmart"
That evening while thinking about how amazing this
new technology was, Jack started to wonder if the
computer could be fooled and make it give a wrong
answer. To this end, he mixed some tap water, a stool
sample from his dog, a urine sample from his wife and
daughter and then he masturbated into the mixture for
good measure. Jack hurries back to Walmart, eager to
check the results. He deposits 10 dollars, pours in
his concoction, and awaits the results. The computer
prints the following:
1) Your tap water is to hard, get a water softener.
2) Your dog has ringworms. Bathe him with anti-fungal shampoo.
3) Your daughter has a cocaine habit, get her into rehab.
4) Your wife is pregnant, TWINS, They aren't yours. Get a lawyer.
5) If you don't stop playing with yourself, your elbow will never get any better.
Thank you for shopping at Walmart!