An atheist was walking through the woods.
"What majestic trees"!

'What powerful rivers"!
"What beautiful animals"!
He said to himself.

As he was walking alongside the river, he heard a rustling in the bushes behind him. He turned to look. He saw a 7-foot grizzly bear charge towards him.

He ran as fast as he could up the path. He looked over his shoulder & saw that the bear was closing in on him.

He looked over his shoulder again, & the bear was even closer. He tripped & fell on the ground. He rolled over to pick himself up but saw that the bear was right on top of him, reaching for him with his left paw & raising his right paw to strike him.

At that instant the Atheist cried out, "Oh my God!"

Time Stopped.
The bear froze.

The forest was silent.

As a bright light shone upon the man, a voice came out of the sky. "You deny my existence for all these years, teach others I don't exist and even credit creation to cosmic accident." "Do you expect me to help you out of this predicament? Am I to count you as a believer"?


The atheist looked directly into the light, "It would be hypocritical of me to suddenly ask you to treat me as a Christian now, but perhaps you could make the BEAR a Christian?"


"Very Well," said the voice.


The light went out. The sounds of the forest resumed. And the bear dropped his right paw, brought both paws together, bowed his head & spoke:





"Lord bless this food, which I am about to receive from thy bounty through Christ our Lord, Amen."

this is the third time ever on AFN that I have read something i bursted into laughter out loud.... Bravo vile...

Which were the first two, if you don't mind me asking?

:lolhit:

When Prae said to another poster "having s*x with you must be like tossing a hotdog down a hallway......... and when I would read some old "before my time" posts from you and warrior 1972......

I believe the same bear.....

Was taking a "dump" in the woods and a small rabbit was doing the same beside him. The rabbit (trying to make small-talk) while doing his "duty" said...

"Nice day, hope the berries and fish are filling you up"

The bear replied "Yeah, it's been a good year for both of those"

The rabbit asked "All is well then, I presume?"

The Bear replied "yep, good year all around... but, let me ask you a question?

The rabbit said "sure, what you need?"

The bear said "do you have problems with shit sticking to your fur?"

The rabbit replied "nope!"

The Bear said "good", and then he proceeded to pick up the rabbit and wipe his ass with him.

:D

That joke is ten times funnier told in person, and instead of saying "then he proceeded to pick up the rabbit and wipe his ass with him," you pantomime picking up a small object and wiping your ass with it, sadistically.

True enough... It lacks the physical "humor" of the personal demonstration.