Global warming advice:

http://www.sherylcrow.com/news.aspx?nid=7786

I propose a limitation be put on how many sqares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required.

Is she just talking about when women go #1 or is this to apply to everybody and everything, because there are plenty of times when I'm into double-digit squares. On the plus side, at least she doesn't want the government to become too intrusive. :rolleyes:

I also like the idea of not using paper napkins, which happen to be made from virgin wood and represent the heighth of wastefullness. I have designed a clothing line that has what's called a "dining sleeve". The sleeve is detachable and can be replaced with another "dining sleeve," after usage. The design will offer the "diner" the convenience of wiping his mouth on his sleeve rather than throwing out yet another barely used paper product.. I think this idea could also translate quite well to those suffering with an annoying head cold.

She has a point about throwing away barely used paper items, but like a lot of people I hear opine about such things, she completely discounts the costs of reusable items. Mainly the environmental cost in water and detergents to clean her arm napkin thing.

:) I like where this goes, and I agree!

Hollywood folk are insane, at least that's the stereotype. Just look at Tom Cruise, Sean Penn, and now Alec Baldwin and his phone call to his daughter. She's got an up-hill battle to try to gain credibility, even if she has some good ideas.

Decka - your troll thingy at the bottom of your posts freaks me out. How do you do that?

I propose a limitation be put on how many sqares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting. Now, I don't want to rob any law-abiding American of his or her God-given rights, but I think we are an industrious enough people that we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required.
How exactly are they going to limit the amount of toilet paper someone can use? They going to plan on having someone stand there and tear off the pieces for you? A machine going to deny you a third square and if it does, couldn't you just get up and come back as if you were another bathroom patron and use more paper? This is crazyness.

I got an idea lets use those 3 sea shells from "demolition man" You know with Sandra Bulluck and Sylvester Stallone and about paper napkins just use cloth napkins and wash them why use a sleeve and make everyone look like a 3 year old wiping his snot off his nose with his sleeve?

Cheryl might have gotten a good voice but she was shortchanged in the brains department.

We have more trees than ever before. Both toilet paper and paper napkins are biodegradable. What could be better. Cloth napkins have to be laundered. That is a multiple use of energy and adds detergents to the groundwater. Sounds worse than using paper to me.

Perhaps Ms. Crow would like to go back to the days of using a communal stick to wipe our bottoms. That would really be pleasant.

...Perhaps Ms. Crow would like to go back to the days of using a communal stick to wipe our bottoms. That would really be pleasant.

Talk about sloppy seconds ... thirds ...

I'm going to use as much as I want...

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b222/godsandmen/potty/looroll.gif

The easy solution to toilet paper and which reduces usage by a whopping 50%.
Use both sides.

hehe.

This thread is disgusting.

The easy solution to toilet paper and which reduces usage by a whopping 50%.
Use both sides.

hehe.
i think my usage might be less than Sheryl's suggustion....on average.

i can shake almost everytime i use a restroom:lolhit:

This thread is disgusting.
when has that ever stopped us?

This thread is disgusting.

Bathroom humor can sometimes be quite dark.

Just remember NOT to shake my hand

How exactly are they going to limit the amount of toilet paper someone can use? They going to plan on having someone stand there and tear off the pieces for you? A machine going to deny you a third square and if it does, couldn't you just get up and come back as if you were another bathroom patron and use more paper? This is crazyness.

Um...it's a joke jere...

Just remember NOT to shake my hand

eeeeewwwwwwwwwww

Oh God. My nose is itching now.

We'd better keep an eye on Sheryl, just to make sure she practices what she preaches...

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b222/godsandmen/potty/Toilet_sign.jpg

Just remember NOT to shake my hand
i not only wash my hands, i yell at stangers that don't.

Sure, I'll use fewer squares - no problem.

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b222/godsandmen/potty/bigtoiletpaper.jpg

Sure, I'll use fewer squares - no problem.

http://i20.photobucket.com/albums/b222/godsandmen/potty/bigtoiletpaper.jpg

Yeeeeeeeeeeeeeha, I can wrap myself in one of those... :D

i not only wash my hands, i yell at stangers that don't.

I do not wash my hands in public bathrooms I use a hand sanitizer after done in the stall and I will tell you why..when you go to the sink to wash your hands what is the first thing you do touch the faucet to turn it on. Your dirty filthy hands all over that faucet along with other peoples dirty germs than you wash your hand and then what do you do... retouch the faucet and reinfect your hand and then touch the paper towel dispensor.

Your hands are no clean.

I think my way is much more sanitary and you would have yelled at me when you are the one spreading germs not me.
:lolhit:

I do not wash my hands in public bathrooms I use a hand sanitizer after done in the stall and I will tell you why..when you go to the sink to wash your hands what is the first thing you do touch the faucet to turn it on. Your dirty filthy hands all over that faucet along with other peoples dirty germs than you wash your hand and then what do you do... retouch the faucet and reinfect your hand and then touch the paper towel dispensor.

Your hands are no clean.

I think my way is much more sanitary and you would have yelled at me when you are the one spreading germs not me.
:lolhit:
if we see each other in a restroom, there's more wrong than you not washing your hands:lolhit:

before you turn the sink on, dispense the paper towel. when you're done washing, dry your hands, turn off the sink it the paper towel, then open the door with the paper towel, and hit the waste basket for 3 points.:thumbs:

you can use all the hand sanitizer and wash your hands raw, but if touch that door, you've done nothing but waste your time.

Yea. Just dont sneeze

:rolleyes: if we see each other in a restroom, there's more wrong than you not washing your hands:lolhit:

before you turn the sink on, dispense the paper towel. when you're done washing, dry your hands, turn off the sink it the paper towel, then open the door with the paper towel, and hit the waste basket for 3 points.:thumbs:

you can use all the hand sanitizer and wash your hands raw, but if touch that door, you've done nothing but waste your time.


Is that supose to be a threat of some sort?:rolleyes:
What the hell is that suppose to mean.

:rolleyes:


Is that supose to be a threat of some sort?:rolleyes:
What the hell is that suppose to mean.
unless everyone before you washed their hands, if you touch that door, you've wasted your time.:rolleyes:

germ warfare eh

:rolleyes:


Is that supose to be a threat of some sort?:rolleyes:
What the hell is that suppose to mean.

jasus warrior, it was not a threat...you are bright, you have a lot to contribute to the community...not everyone here is out to gut you... so don't gut them first.

He means that he is male...the the way the restrooms are set up in your country, the odds of meeting up in a washroom are fairly small...

germ warfare eh
baaaaahahaha...that was great...my first gut laugh for the evening...

jasus warrior, it was not a threat...you are bright, you have a lot to contribute to the community...not everyone here is out to gut you... so don't gut them first.

He means that he is male...the the way the restrooms are set up in your country, the odds of meeting up in a washroom are fairly small...

OH I didn't know he was a guy :(

My apologies.

OH I didn't know he was a guy :(

My apologies.

Hey baby, now you are getting it. You may fit in yet. :D yeeeeeeha!

I use hand sanitizer too. AFTER I leave the bathroom and touch the door and all that. In fact I use it religiously. Every time I even THINK about germs I have to get it out and use it.

I use hand sanitizer too. AFTER I leave the bathroom and touch the door and all that. In fact I use it religiously. Every time I even THINK about germs I have to get it out and use it.

Heeeey another germ-a-phob, welcome to my neurotic challenge. I must bleach my counters twice a day... :D

Talk about sloppy seconds ... thirds ...

The stick had a long handle that you held while using the shorter, curved end to wipe. In the dark some people occassionally grabed the wrong end of the stick, hence the saying, grabbing the short end of the stick.

The stick had a long handle that you held while using the shorter, curved end to wipe. In the dark some people occassionally grabed the wrong end of the stick, hence the saying, grabbing the short end of the stick.
What sort of barbarous society was this?

Medieval European society.

Related story:

A college classmate and friend of my youngest son spent a semester studying in Indonesia. In rural Indonesian they don't use toilet paper. Instead, they use their left hand and then rinse it in a bucket of water.

My son's friend lived with a rural family and got explosive diarhea for a few weeks because of the spicy food they served. You have to hear him tell the story of his adventures in the bathroom.

Ewwwww hand toilet paper with diarrhea.

Medieval European society.

Related story:

A college classmate and friend of my youngest son spent a semester studying in Indonesia. In rural Indonesian they don't use toilet paper. Instead, they use their left hand and then rinse it in a bucket of water.

My son's friend lived with a rural family and got explosive diarhea for a few weeks because of the spicy food they served. You have to hear him tell the story of his adventures in the bathroom.

Oh geez, with my weak stomach, I just know that would have been me. :(

A story on a similar note....

I have a friend who runs a manufacturing operation in China. A "good old boy" North Georgia mechanic traveled out to assist in some machinery set up for my friend's company. The morning that the mechanic arrived at the plant, my friend was busy taking care of some other issues and pointed out the machine that needed work. A few hours later, he returned to see how the mechanic was faring. He then remembered that he had not given the fellow one of the celephane wrapped packages of Kleenex that were used in the bathroom by the visitors (I guess the Chineese use the left hand too?). To which the mechanic said this great line.....

"I wish that I'd known about that.... I just ruint a purfectly good sock"

Well gee, people, in the rural areas anyways could do what was done in teh old days and use the corn cobs and the husks as toilet paper. Apparently, after soaking for a while the cob and husk are soft and are able to be used for such purposes. Be rather hard to flush corn cobs though, shall we put THAT in the garbage?

We could do what the desert dwelling Arabs and the Asians used to do and just use the left hand. If you've ever wondered why the left hand was considered unclean, you now know, dammit.

Let's see, we could take the advice of loggers who really don't like environmentalists and try cleaning posteriors with plastic.

We could recycle the toilet paper.

We could have a friend of neighbor take us to the backyard and hose us off after we've had a good sit down (don't count on having many friendly neighbors once you start asking them THAT)

**************************************************

On a more serious note, hemp is supposed to make good paper for both the office and the bathroom, what is the feasibility of using hemp?

And Sheryl Crow really needs to run her ideas past people who live in the real world before she starts shooting off her mouth, she ain't going to live this one down anytime soon, damit.

How can you tell if you are at Cheryl Crow's house?















You see all the toilet paper hanging up in the back yard to dry.

Scientist Dreams of Toilet Paper-Free Era
By Frank Thadeusz

A German physicist at Procter & Gamble is working on a bizarre project -- the gradual elimination of toilet paper as we know it. But first he would like to make the trip to the toilet a little more comfortable.


Ben Behnke
Siedfried Hustedt in the Procter & Gamble laboratory in Schwalbach, Germany
Siegfried Hustedt is often overcome with dread when he is forced to use other people's toilets. The toilet paper he encounters in those bathrooms is almost inevitably colored or white, fluted or spotted. But for all the paper's pleasing appearance, appearance is all it is -- when used, the chintzy material often gets lumpy and decomposes into an unsavory pile of cellulose as "the embossment structure collapses under pressure." Even more dramatic is the excoriated red sore caused by overly rough foliage. Hustedt, 40, can't help but ask himself why so "many people choose to suffer to the last roll."

It would be safe to call Hustedt a toilet paper connoisseur. The experimental physicist works for Procter & Gamble's research center in Schwalbach, Germany, near Frankfurt, where together with his fellow researchers, he is developing the toilet paper of the future. His latest creation is a toilet paper that is soft, removes a good deal and promises sparing use -- factors that have captivated the competition while also satisfying the wishes of consumers.


FROM THE MAGAZINE
Find out how you can reprint this DER SPIEGEL article in your publication. Here's how the lab's absorbant wonder works: The conventional manufacturing process involves toilet paper rolls being pressed from cellulose pulp. The paper produced is initially smooth; its later surface structure is just the product of subsequent embossing. But Hustedt and his researchers have developed a new method. They spray the wood-based raw material onto a special grid in a graduated manufacturing process that yields a three-dimensional paper structure experts believe can "hold its shape longer under pressure."

In addition, the researchers are using different types of fibers, which guarantee both the softness and the sturdiness of their toilet paper. When Germany's leading consumer advice group, Stiftung Warentest, test drove the toilet paper, which is marketed here under the Charmin brand, last summer, it wrote that it is "one of the best things you can do for yourself and your derrière."

Intoxicated by the positive response, Hustedt now takes pleasure in badmouthing "certain limitations of our competitors." The structure expert mocks competing companies for "just slapping one ply onto another."

Plie talk

The more plies, the better, most German consumers seem to think. Market researchers have sounded out the most hidden nooks of consumer interest and brought to light the last secrets of anal hygiene -- including the clandestinely cultivated habit of Germans to make additional folds to their already multilayered toilet paper. Most Americans, by comparison, prefer a method largely unknown in Germany -- they scrunch up their relatively thin paper into an easy-to-handle ball.


Ben Behnke
Using marbles to test for tear strength
Accordingly, Procter & Gamble's main business rival Kimberly-Clark has discovered that "there is much talk of plies on the German market." But paper structure isn't everything -- it's just one aspect "among many" in the creation of a successful toilet paper, a company spokesman says, taking a jab at Procter & Gamble. Kimberly-Clark sassily continues to claim leadership in the premium segment of the toilet paper market, with its Hakle brand of toilet paper and wet toilet wipes.

Under the banner of environmental friendliness and efficiency, Hustedt and his colleagues at Procter & Gamble are currently pursuing an even more revolutionary plan: the complete reduction of their own creation. Instead of rigging up their product with as many as five plies, their air-dried cellulose glop makes do with just two -- "with improved absorbing capacity," the physicist emphasizes.

The man in charge likes to test the absorbency himself from time to time -- by spooning dark green honeydew honey onto the plies. The laboratory team tests the tear strength by weighting down the toilet tissue with glass marbles.

Hustedt is already boldly dreaming of his next great pitch: "Why shouldn't we be able to achieve our current result with just one ply?" He claims that a single ply of the toilet paper he developed is good enough to provide satisfactory cleansing.

A brave new, toilet-free world

Full of relish, the scientist has even begun devoting himself to the wayward idea of making "toilet paper entirely superfluous." The idea isn't altogether absurd: A large part of the world's population has no trouble whatsoever getting by without toilet paper. Indians and Arabs manage with their left hand and a bit of water. Some nomad peoples are reported to clean themselves with sand after following nature's call.

The same cleansing process is performed far more luxuriously by using so-called "washlets." A gentle jet of water from the depths of the toilet bowl caresses the afflicted backside. The Japanese are especially fond of turning to washlets to avoid the bothersome process of scrubbing themselves with raw fibers.


NEWSLETTER
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Many proctologists believe the use of dry toilet paper is "fundamentally wrong." Concerned about diseases afflicting the sensitive skin around the anus, the Vienna-based Initiative for Anal Hygiene recommends "cleansing using flowing, temperate water" and "subsequent drying using a blow-dryer."

In terms of cultural history, the triumph of the toilet paper roll was never a given. The Americans saw no use whatsoever for the expensive product at first -- and for a long time they preferred wiping their behinds with paper torn out of free catalogs. And in 1950s Germany, purchasing toilet paper -- a commodity that has long since become a necessity of life -- was an extremely embarrassing activity.

Such inhibitions still seem to have an effect today. Even an enlightened scientist like Hustedt admits: "Going to the bathroom isn't exactly something that people look forward to."

I know several folks in these parts, my age or older, who grew up with outhouses.

These people used Sears catalogs or newspapers.

so, you could get an eder-cation AND shop while you were wiling away the time.

You had to watch out, tho, for the spiders and wasps who enjoyed the smelly abode.

There's a famous story around here of a woman happily perched on the outhouse seat, browsing the Sears catalog, when the whole structure was towed away by a tractor. A true story.

I grew up with no electricity and using an outhouse. When I was a young kid we moved from NYC out to Long Island which at the time was very rural. We had a few acres on which we grew our own fruits and vegetables and raised chickens, ducks, geese, pigeons, rabbits and a goat for food. Since we were the only house on the block they told us we would have to pay to have electricity brought from the main road to our house. It would have cost my parents as much as the house cost so we went about a year and a half with no electricity and no indoor bathroom. We had a hand pump for indoor water but no bathroom hooked up in the house. We did have a nifty outhouse though. It was even flushable, using a bucket of water from our outside pump.


http://www.lucianne.com/routine/images/04-25-07.jpg
DO NOT SHAKE HANDS WITH THIS WOMAN!

Im sure that streets changed a bit since then.
No more red coats for a start.

It was in 1947, not 1747, Paul.

Do you ever drive down the street and look at the changes F

Yes and it is always a bit depressing.

I grew up in that house and had a wonderful, if poor childhood. We didn't have much money but we had other intangible things that were more important. My mother didn't work so she was always around to take care of me. When my father was home he made sure to include me as his little helper and made me feel important and special.

I got to feed the poultry and rabbits and play with the goat and all the dogs and cats we kept. I picked fresh, wild blackberries right from my yard for breakfast. There were always trees to climb, an orchard and long grape arbor where I could just go and pick fruit to eat, places where I could dig underground forts. We never locked out doors. We spent our time together. It was a wonderful way to grow up.

Nice one Frogger, sounds good, you were a lucky young lad.
Unfortunately the world seems to be obsessed with material wealth these days, and kids dont enjoy or want the simple things in life anymore.
I would have loved to have seen NYC in the 50s, what with the cars and the cloths people wore, I think it was a magical time in a magical place.