Match.com, Friendster.com, Dating.com. There's just too many online dating websites. My question is for those of you who have used them or even those of you who are seriously considering using them.

Before asking my questions I want to state that I'm a 30yo bachelor male with much more concern about career than dating. Dating for me, like most men my age (and younger) is more about "pump & dump", to paraphrase the stock market. I cant say that there is a "need" to get married or a "need" to have children. Certainly that's what i see as the "normal" thing to do but I cant imagine it feeling enjoyable after a few months (proof: 60% of marriages never last). Long term relationships dont seem likely more because of the engineering of men. But that's my view. Nonetheless I am fascinated by the whole ritual, in particular what goes on in the minds of women. It seems much more complicated and purposeful, a far cry from the archaic mentality of men whose every actions can be explained by Power and Sex. ]:O

Regardless of gender or sexual preference I "need" to know what drives you toward these websites, these reorganized messageboards with pics charging a monthly fee. Are you feeling lonely, social pressure because it is the normal thing to do? What is the vision that drives you? Please be honest.

My other question is do you think these services are doing everything they can to service you or do you still feel like they arent providing that elusive outlet to satisfy that need? What would you do to improve them, what's missing?

I've just signed up at Match.com (username: Quantass) to assist in my studies.

Um...I don't know how much my opinion counts on this...I have taken part in online dating...Guess I still sorta am although I've met the person now and everything has gone well. I didn't go to an online dating service though, and I never will. My friends and I would frequent a particular chat room and I just got to talking to him and we just got along and could talk for hours on end. That was a couple years ago though. We talked just online for a year then I started calling him and then we met. I think that's slightly different from what you're talking about though...

The actual dating services I really don't understand. My internet relationship was a chance encounter that lasted, I didn't go looking for love online. Although I don't have a history with Online Dating Services...I have had friends use them and I really doubt it's social pressure telling them to get online and look for a g/f or b/f because to be honesty he gets picked at quite a bit by other friends for having resorted to online dating services and not just once. I would think the reasons for going to them is different for each person, some probably do go because they're lonely. Some might do it because they feel they don't have enough time to go out and meet people the traditional way. As for my friend...I tend to think he was lonely and going through rough times although I doubt he'd ever admit so himself. And after re-reading your post I don't think this will help you much...But if you think there is anything I can answer knowing I've been/still am involved in a sorta online relationship feel free to ask here or pm me I'd be glad to help.

Amy

OK, I'll fess up. Not only did I use one of those websites, but I married the woman I met from there. Frankly I wasn't expecting much and I don't know what bizarre set of circumstances led to me meeint my soul mate on there, but that's what happened. Why did I do it? I wasn't meeting many people and there certainly weren't many prospects at work. There was very little social pressure on me, but I personally wanted to get married and have children and all of that stuff.

i met my hubby through yahoo personals. my friends and i were messing around one day and we all put an ad up. we never really checked it but about 3 months later i got an email from this guy. we started chatting on the puter and the phone and about 4 months later he moved back to florida to be with me. no, i did not plan on meeting my husband on the net. it just happened and i am oh so glad it did.

Why the OBSESSION over Online Dating ??
..the same: why the obsession over online shopping? -) over ONLINE?
People are spending lots of time online, just as they spent outside before.. I guess this service (online dating) has something interesting for people to offer, don't you think so? Chatting online you can't hear persons voice, intonation, don't see his/her gestures (well..webcams?..uhm..not quite)... All this is mostly left up to your imagination. You can never what the person in real life is...That could be attractive..No?