Top 10 signs Santa is having Marital Problems

1. He's replaced all the elves with scantily clad Swedish boy exchange students.
2. Mrs. Claus calls him "that fat freak in the red underwear"
3. He traded in his sleigh for a van with a waterbed
4. He's been spending a little too much time with the life-sized Holiday Kenny
5. Mrs. Claus having cybersex relationship with accountant from New Jersey.
6. He knows when she's been sleeping, he knows when she's awake, because he's bugged the bedroom.
7. Lately, she keeps "forgetting" to tie her robe when she brings the elves their morning coffee.
8. Stockings aren't the only things he's been nailing in front of the fireplace.
9. Not a creature is stirring in Santa's pants
10. His new live-in personal elf valet, Steve.

Santa is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over which one should go and answer the doorbell, Mrs. Claus gives up, quickly wraps herself up in a towel and runs downstairs.

When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she can say a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you 800 dollars to drop that towel that you have on.”

After thinking for a moment, Santa's wife drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After several long seconds of viewing her most private treasures, Bob hands her 800 dollars and leaves. Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.

When she gets back to the bathroom, Santa asks from the shower “Who was that?”
“It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies.

“Great,” shouts Santa, “did he say anything about the 800 dollars he owes me?”
:rolleyes: :eek: :p :cool: ;) :D

Santa is getting into the shower just as his wife is finishing up her shower when the doorbell rings. After a few seconds of arguing over which one should go and answer the doorbell, Mrs. Claus gives up, quickly wraps herself up in a towel and runs downstairs.

When she opens the door, there stands Bob, the next door neighbor. Before she can say a word, Bob says, “I’ll give you 800 dollars to drop that towel that you have on.”

After thinking for a moment, Santa's wife drops her towel and stands naked in front of Bob. After several long seconds of viewing her most private treasures, Bob hands her 800 dollars and leaves. Confused, but excited about her good fortune, the woman wraps back up in the towel and goes back upstairs.

When she gets back to the bathroom, Santa asks from the shower “Who was that?”
“It was Bob the next door neighbor,” she replies.

“Great,” shouts Santa, “did he say anything about the 800 dollars he owes me?”
:rolleyes: :eek: :p :cool: ;) :D

Well now that was naughty but nice.