Sparky2
09-04-2006, 07:58 AM
A couple of years ago, the California Supreme Court ruled that a San Francisco judge had overstepped his authority to perform same-sex marriages. This effectively nullified over 4,000 of these ‘marriages’.
The mind reels...…
Midge: (Walking in the front door from work) Guess what, we're not married anymore!
Pat: (Buries her face in her hands and bursts into tears) I knew it, you've found somebody more attractive than me!!
Midge: You twit, stop being such a cream-puff!! I didn't say I'm divorcing you, I said we're not MARRIED anymore. The California Supreme Court has just declared our wedding null and void!
Pat: Can they do that? We paid the fee, and got the license and blood test and everything! We had a priest. We were catered even!
Midge: You know what this means, don't you? We are now living in sin! We have to move into separate rooms I guess.
Pat: But, but.. You mean to say we can't do Fluffy Bunnies anymore?
Midge: Nope.
Pat: Munch the carpet?
Midge: No.
Pat: Can you at least put alligator clamps on my nippies, and spank me like a bad girl??
Midge: No, no, no, no, NO!! Look, I'm a San Francisco City Council-person, and a Deaconette of the church. What would it LOOK like, us carrying-on like that?
Pat: *sniff* It's just not fair!
Midge: All this stuff has to go back to our wedding guests. The candlesticks, the chafing dish, the wine rack, the strap-on double-dong marital aid, EVERYthing!!
Pat: It's those Republicans isn't it?? First they want to invade our Alaskan wilderness for oil, then they want to go to war over flimsy WMD evidence, and NOW they want to make it so that decent, self-respecting homos, limp-wrists, faeries, queens, dykes, lesbos, and even sturdy girls with sensible shoes can't be married and live happily every after!!! Damn that Arnold Schwartzenegger! DAMN that George Bush!!
Midge: I tell you, it's enough to make me want to register to vote, and then go down and vote for somebody other than Bush! Who's his opponent this time around? Not Al Gore again, I hope. He was so sweaty and repulsive.
Pat: You mean Ralph Nader?
Midge: Nader is still alive? No, I mean the other guy. That pompous ass from Massachusetts. The one married to the charming, multi-lingual, lesbian-looking woman with the interesting accent.
Pat: Mmmm.. Theresa Heinz Kerry. That's one prime piece of cheesecake there. I'd go to the White House and intern for her anyday!
Midge: You little tart! We're not even un-married for a whole day yet, and you've already got designs on another fish-wife!!
Pat: Oh honey-beast. (purrs and melts into Midge's arms) You know you're the only dyke for me. Married or not, you're still my main significant-other and principal life partner. You know that.
Midge: And you're my little slutty-girl. And you always will be, no matter what those Republicans say. Hmmm, what say you go pull down the shades, sugar-foot? I think I've changed my mind about making Fluffy Bunnies.
Pat: Yippie!!!!
:banana:
The mind reels...…
Midge: (Walking in the front door from work) Guess what, we're not married anymore!
Pat: (Buries her face in her hands and bursts into tears) I knew it, you've found somebody more attractive than me!!
Midge: You twit, stop being such a cream-puff!! I didn't say I'm divorcing you, I said we're not MARRIED anymore. The California Supreme Court has just declared our wedding null and void!
Pat: Can they do that? We paid the fee, and got the license and blood test and everything! We had a priest. We were catered even!
Midge: You know what this means, don't you? We are now living in sin! We have to move into separate rooms I guess.
Pat: But, but.. You mean to say we can't do Fluffy Bunnies anymore?
Midge: Nope.
Pat: Munch the carpet?
Midge: No.
Pat: Can you at least put alligator clamps on my nippies, and spank me like a bad girl??
Midge: No, no, no, no, NO!! Look, I'm a San Francisco City Council-person, and a Deaconette of the church. What would it LOOK like, us carrying-on like that?
Pat: *sniff* It's just not fair!
Midge: All this stuff has to go back to our wedding guests. The candlesticks, the chafing dish, the wine rack, the strap-on double-dong marital aid, EVERYthing!!
Pat: It's those Republicans isn't it?? First they want to invade our Alaskan wilderness for oil, then they want to go to war over flimsy WMD evidence, and NOW they want to make it so that decent, self-respecting homos, limp-wrists, faeries, queens, dykes, lesbos, and even sturdy girls with sensible shoes can't be married and live happily every after!!! Damn that Arnold Schwartzenegger! DAMN that George Bush!!
Midge: I tell you, it's enough to make me want to register to vote, and then go down and vote for somebody other than Bush! Who's his opponent this time around? Not Al Gore again, I hope. He was so sweaty and repulsive.
Pat: You mean Ralph Nader?
Midge: Nader is still alive? No, I mean the other guy. That pompous ass from Massachusetts. The one married to the charming, multi-lingual, lesbian-looking woman with the interesting accent.
Pat: Mmmm.. Theresa Heinz Kerry. That's one prime piece of cheesecake there. I'd go to the White House and intern for her anyday!
Midge: You little tart! We're not even un-married for a whole day yet, and you've already got designs on another fish-wife!!
Pat: Oh honey-beast. (purrs and melts into Midge's arms) You know you're the only dyke for me. Married or not, you're still my main significant-other and principal life partner. You know that.
Midge: And you're my little slutty-girl. And you always will be, no matter what those Republicans say. Hmmm, what say you go pull down the shades, sugar-foot? I think I've changed my mind about making Fluffy Bunnies.
Pat: Yippie!!!!
:banana: