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BorgHunter
01-22-2004, 04:55 PM
for Y2K

es347fan
01-22-2004, 04:56 PM
by changing "commies" for "taliban" & "al queda", but keeping the closet queen attitude toward

BorgHunter
01-22-2004, 05:01 PM
various angry

es347fan
01-22-2004, 05:05 PM
individuals in same sex relationships who wish only

BorgHunter
01-22-2004, 05:09 PM
to frolic naked in

es347fan
01-22-2004, 07:19 PM
fields of flowers

BorgHunter
01-22-2004, 07:23 PM
planted by Farmer Joe

es347fan
01-22-2004, 07:28 PM
who plants flowers to hide the bud he makes his money with

BorgHunter
01-22-2004, 07:35 PM
which is hidden in a basement

es347fan
01-22-2004, 07:48 PM
more of a root cellar, actually

BorgHunter
01-22-2004, 07:59 PM
complete with roots and grow lights

es347fan
01-22-2004, 08:07 PM
and several exhaust fans to dissipate the aroma

BorgHunter
01-22-2004, 08:59 PM
that permeates his being

(Agh, for a minute I read that as "sexual exhaust fans". Strange.)

es347fan
01-22-2004, 09:26 PM
Farmer Joe is always loaded

(ahh the perils of pubescent exploding hormones!)(only 5 more years of that ... maybe)

BorgHunter
01-23-2004, 07:29 PM
onto a paddy wagon when

es347fan
01-23-2004, 09:41 PM
he sings "Waltzing Matilda" in the town square

BorgHunter
01-25-2004, 10:56 AM
in front of Farmer Eric

es347fan
01-25-2004, 03:16 PM
who plays the harmonica

HaVoK
01-25-2004, 03:42 PM
while somehow managing at the same time to

es347fan
01-25-2004, 04:51 PM
juggle a dozen eggs using only his feet

BorgHunter
01-27-2004, 02:41 PM
, which excludes his eyes

es347fan
01-27-2004, 03:58 PM
he lost one when running with scissors,

HaVoK
01-27-2004, 04:43 PM
while at the same time drinking

BorgHunter
01-27-2004, 07:21 PM
amaretto & Pepsi (blech!)

es347fan
01-27-2004, 08:07 PM
the other plucked out by a buzzard as he lay in a drunken stupor

BorgHunter
01-28-2004, 04:54 PM
on the floor of a

es347fan
01-28-2004, 05:05 PM
revival tent, after having consumed nearly a gallon of moonshine

BorgHunter
01-28-2004, 05:10 PM
in the sunshine

es347fan
01-28-2004, 05:13 PM
while attempting to make sense of a hellfire & brimstone bible thumper

HaVoK
01-28-2004, 07:08 PM
who is making eyes at

es347fan
01-28-2004, 08:02 PM
the fat lady in the polka-dot dress sitting next to his mother

HaVoK
01-28-2004, 09:38 PM
all the while thinking to himself

es347fan
01-29-2004, 04:02 AM
"boy, oh boy, my sister looks fine tonite"

HaVoK
01-29-2004, 08:41 AM
he starts to imagine what it would be like to

es347fan
01-29-2004, 01:09 PM
procreate with both his mother and sister

BorgHunter
01-29-2004, 03:29 PM
, especially both at the same time

es347fan
01-29-2004, 03:39 PM
while working himself into a tongue speaking frenzy, taking the focus from

BorgHunter
01-29-2004, 03:59 PM
"Dr." James Dobson, who is yelling at the top of his lungs

es347fan
01-29-2004, 04:15 PM
when suddenly, as a result of the certain overdose on moonshine, his other eye simply burst

es347fan
01-30-2004, 08:22 PM
open and a caterpillar crawled out

BorgHunter
01-31-2004, 06:38 PM
and began to shriek

(Hey! You can't go twice in a row! ::shakes fist menacingly:: )

es347fan
01-31-2004, 09:57 PM
screaming in Swahili

(nobody was posting to this, I needed to move it back up the ladder some)

BorgHunter
02-01-2004, 06:54 AM
, which attracted members of

es347fan
02-01-2004, 07:33 AM
the Pentecostal church down the road who came to witness

BorgHunter
02-01-2004, 09:01 AM
a hrrible crime commited by

es347fan
02-01-2004, 08:22 PM
the reincarnation of St John the Kennedy in his ritual

BorgHunter
02-03-2004, 03:21 PM
lecture on the merits of

es347fan
02-03-2004, 03:25 PM
having a bootlegger in the family

BorgHunter
02-03-2004, 03:41 PM
farm's old barn with old bathtubs full of

es347fan
02-03-2004, 07:40 PM
fermented mushroom slush

BorgHunter
02-03-2004, 08:35 PM
and bat (not bird) droppings

es347fan
02-03-2004, 08:51 PM
create a hallucinogenic beverage

BorgHunter
02-04-2004, 05:53 PM
named "the Pan-Galactic Gargle Blaster"

HaVoK
02-04-2004, 06:31 PM
that is said to have certain "enhancement" properties that will

es347fan
02-04-2004, 08:10 PM
cause tentacles to grow & interconnect all surface areas of the brain

BorgHunter
02-05-2004, 04:41 PM
, lungs, and testicles

es347fan
02-05-2004, 06:08 PM
temporarily resulting in an enhanced human, although wildly intoxicated

BorgHunter
02-06-2004, 05:29 PM
with mushroom juice

Wizbang
02-06-2004, 06:32 PM
that made him sick

es347fan
02-06-2004, 07:38 PM
yet able to see in the dark for 3 full nights

BorgHunter
02-06-2004, 10:00 PM
with heatvision

es347fan
02-07-2004, 02:47 PM
detecting in the infared specturms

Wizbang
02-07-2004, 06:03 PM
of the universe

es347fan
02-07-2004, 09:21 PM
a hallucinogenic kaleidoscope

Wizbang
02-07-2004, 09:54 PM
visioning angels all around

es347fan
02-08-2004, 05:59 AM
each on a carousel

BorgHunter
02-10-2004, 05:56 PM
operated by an also-hallucinating

es347fan
02-10-2004, 10:13 PM
one eyed, one armed ex-roadie named Jake

BorgHunter
02-11-2004, 04:50 PM
the Flake, a guy who

es347fan
02-11-2004, 06:22 PM
could make a stage erupt in colors

BorgHunter
02-11-2004, 06:25 PM
never before seen by human eyes

es347fan
02-11-2004, 07:42 PM
without resorting to cheap pyrotechnics

BorgHunter
02-11-2004, 07:55 PM
, instead just LSD and

es347fan
02-11-2004, 08:15 PM
mescaline, in an iced tea broth

BorgHunter
02-12-2004, 05:27 AM
with ice cubes and a parasol

es347fan
02-12-2004, 08:01 AM
served only to members of the band

BorgHunter
02-12-2004, 11:16 AM
named "Fhqwgads"

es347fan
02-12-2004, 12:30 PM
heavily made up, clad in gothic attire, playing

BorgHunter
02-13-2004, 07:23 AM
bagpipes and accordions

es347fan
02-13-2004, 08:40 AM
attached to Marshall stacks & various sound modifying devices

BorgHunter
02-13-2004, 08:56 AM
including amplifiers, silencers, and

es347fan
02-13-2004, 10:37 AM
distortion units, Leslie speaker cabinets, synthetic chorus, and a Moog

(marshall stacks are huge amplifiers)

BorgHunter
02-13-2004, 12:59 PM
, which is a

(I honestly don't know what a Moog is either, and a dictonary run reveals nothing)

es347fan
02-13-2004, 01:23 PM
synthesizer (http://arts.ucsc.edu/ems/music/equipment/synthesizers/analog/moog/Moog.html)

BorgHunter
02-13-2004, 01:46 PM
which looks like it could use some punch cards

es347fan
02-13-2004, 01:52 PM
Fortran

BorgHunter
02-13-2004, 02:09 PM
and COBOL programmers need to type up

es347fan
02-13-2004, 04:35 PM
plenty of wires

BorgHunter
02-13-2004, 05:28 PM
and connect them to

es347fan
02-13-2004, 05:52 PM
each band member

BorgHunter
02-13-2004, 06:06 PM
and connect the other ends to high voltage

es347fan
02-13-2004, 07:21 PM
ensuring they sing in the proper pitch

BorgHunter
02-13-2004, 07:31 PM
, namely, soprano

es347fan
02-13-2004, 07:39 PM
doing so makes the bagpipes louder, the

BorgHunter
02-13-2004, 09:53 PM
accordions more annoying, and

es347fan
02-14-2004, 07:43 AM
so annoyingly shrill that one's teeth hurt if standing any closer than 50 yards

BorgHunter
02-14-2004, 07:08 PM
even with hamburger earmuffs

es347fan
02-14-2004, 08:32 PM
and wax earplugs, yet they still play to capacity crowds of

BorgHunter
02-14-2004, 09:01 PM
slack-jawed yokels

es347fan
02-14-2004, 09:46 PM
none of whom got past 7th grade before turning 30