Dear friends,

I am from Russia and I need to write a letter to our foreign supplier.
The problem is that I do not know England tradition and joke.
The topic of the letter is that we ask our supplier to send us New Year gifts, such as corporate pens, diaries, and the like. Because they have many clients and nothing else but forget about some of them.

I don no how to write that the letter should be joky and playful with a hint.

DEar native-speaker! I will be VERY VERY grateful to you all!!!!

Many many years ago in a small village lived a............................

Noella ......first and foremost (I hate to break the news to you .....but ..since the Berlin wall has come down)....there is no such thing as a free lunch. Show me the money .......*EG*.

If you are serious ..PM me.


Slim

Hello,

I'd start the letter with "Dear Sir" or "Dear Madam", then, go on to say to please send the items to a certain address.

Then, close the letter with a "thank-you" and "Very truly yours", and then your name.

I have to write a lot of letters where I work. Good luck!

Find some magazines and cut out the letters for the words: 'I have your son, leave one million by the phone booth on Pyotr Street or he dies on wednesday'.
Then take the letters you've cut out and paste them in the order shown above, send it to them dripping with a red liquid on the letter, i suggest some sort of ketchup or jelly, maybe blood from your finger. Enclose in an envelope and take it to the post office.

Send it by express mail so it is sent quickly. :D

*Note: Do not do this, if you decide to, I am not liable for your actions, but- if the plan goes through accordingly, send me 20%. Thanks

"Dear cuntfaces:

Hello! My name is Jack Meoff, and I am interested in receiving free poontang from you. If this deal interests you, please send your correspondence to our address.

Up your nose with a rubber hose,
Jack Meoff"

Originally posted by Evakian
Find some magazines and cut out the letters for the words: 'I have your son, leave one million by the phone booth on Pyotr Street or he dies on wednesday'.
Then take the letters you've cut out and paste them in the order shown above, send it to them dripping with a red liquid on the letter, i suggest some sort of ketchup or jelly, maybe blood from your finger. Enclose in an envelope and take it to the post office.

Send it by express mail so it is sent quickly. :D

*Note: Do not do this, if you decide to, I am not liable for your actions, but- if the plan goes through accordingly, send me 20%. Thanks

What kind of crook ARE you?
Not express mail!
They can trace that!
She should just drop the envelope, (wearing gloves all the while of course, which she should then burn) in an out of town mailbox dropoff, late at night so no one sees her.
Or, if she wants to be REALLY mean, mail it from a neighbor who she doesn't like's house.
PLEASE leave the crime to the experts. Thanks.

Originally posted by rendova
Not express mail!
They can trace that!

Wear a wig and shades, use an alias if asked for a name (Rusty Shackleford, John Smith, Billy Crystal), and drop the letter in the "express mailbox" or leave it at the requisite place in the post office and use your mother-in-law's house as the return address, not that difficult. And the gloves thing is just sort of default...

Originally posted by Evakian
Find some magazines and cut out the letters for the words: 'I have your son, leave one million by the phone booth on Pyotr Street or he dies on wednesday'.
Then take the letters you've cut out and paste them in the order shown above, send it to them dripping with a red liquid on the letter, i suggest some sort of ketchup or jelly, maybe blood from your finger. Enclose in an envelope and take it to the post office.

Send it by express mail so it is sent quickly. :D

*Note: Do not do this, if you decide to, I am not liable for your actions, but- if the plan goes through accordingly, send me 20%. Thanks



SOOOO WRONG !!

BUT SOOOOO FUNNY !!!

:eek:

Originally posted by Evakian
Find some magazines and cut out the letters for the words: 'I have your son, leave one million by the phone booth on Pyotr Street or he dies on wednesday'.
Then take the letters you've cut out and paste them in the order shown above, send it to them dripping with a red liquid on the letter, i suggest some sort of ketchup or jelly, maybe blood from your finger. Enclose in an envelope and take it to the post office.

Send it by express mail so it is sent quickly. :D

*Note: Do not do this, if you decide to, I am not liable for your actions, but- if the plan goes through accordingly, send me 20%. Thanks



FUNNY