Evangelical Scientists Refute Gravity with New "Intelligent Falling" Theory

OPEKA, KS—As the debate over the teaching of evolution in public schools continues, a new controversy over the science curriculum arose Monday in this embattled Midwestern state. Scientists from the Evangelical Center For Faith-Based Reasoning are now asserting that the long-held "theory of gravity" is flawed, and they have responded to it with a new theory of Intelligent Falling.

"Things fall not because they are acted upon by some gravitational force, but because a higher intelligence, 'God' if you will, is pushing them down," said Gabriel Burdett, who holds degrees in education, applied Scripture, and physics from Oral Roberts University.

http://www.theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4133&n=2

God I love the Onion...

This has been posted in science already.

:eek:

That HAS to be made up. There's just no way that's real.

I'm going to do a search on it right now...

Update: Un. Fucking. Believable. It's real. How scary is that???

Update: Un. Fucking. Believable. It's real. How scary is that???
LOL
It's The Onion. The Onion itself doesn't exist! How could anything written by them be true?

Originally posted by Blibblob
LOL
It's The Onion. The Onion itself doesn't exist! How could anything written by them be true?
Well, I know it exists :), but I was so blown away by the story, I had to check it out anyway.

It's a joke but it makes a very good point about how idiodic " design is.

Another one like is Flying Spaghetti Monsterism (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Spaghetti_Monster)

Flying Spaghetti Monsterism is a religion created to protest the decision by the Kansas State Board of Education to allow intelligent design to be taught in science classes alongside evolution.

The "religion" has since become an Internet phenomenon garnering many followers of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (sometimes referring to themselves as "Pastafarians", a pun on Rastafarians) who claim to have been touched by "His Noodly Appendage" and preach the word of their "noodly master" as the one true religion. Flying Spaghetti Monsterism is primarily the invention of Bobby Henderson, a graduate of Oregon State University with a degree in physics.

Most scientists don't believe this garbage. I love how conservates whine about political correctness, yet they don't seem to mind what is esentially dumbing down the science class to justify people's beliefs.

I don't mind if you believe in fairytales. This is America, go right ahead. Just keep it out of my science book please!

The Onion itself doesn't exist! yeah it does! I picked up a few copies in NYC.

Prea if you don't know the brillance that is the onion i suggest you start checking it out every week or so.

www.theonion.com

The Onion is no longer as good as it used to be.

Originally posted by 500lbguerilla
Prea if you don't know the brillance that is the onion i suggest you start checking it out every week or so.

www.theonion.com
I'll start checking it out. I've heard of it, but never read it.

There just not as consistant lately they still have some real gems...

Iraqi Cop Moonlighting as Terrorist Just to Make Ends Meet
http://www.theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4133&n=3

Of course the best section has always been "What do you think?"

They were much better when they were based in Madison, Wisconsin. A few years ago they decided to go big time and moved to New York. They've been going downhill ever since.